So, you’re ready to dip your toes into the wild world of swinging? Fantastic! But before you jump in headfirst, let’s make sure you’re equipped with the essentials to navigate this thrilling lifestyle like a pro. Here’s your sassy guide to the top do’s and don’ts of swinging—because nobody wants to be “that person” at the party!
Don’t forget to check out more newbie swinger advice in our Vanilla Swingers podcast.
Do #1 : Communicate Openly
Before you even think about swapping partners, sit down with your significant other and have a heart-to-heart. Discuss your desires, boundaries, and any concerns. Be as honest as you can! This isn’t just about your fantasies; it’s about ensuring both of you are on the same page. Remember, a solid foundation makes for a much smoother ride!
Do #2 : Dress to Impress
Whether you’re hitting a swanky swinger club or a more laid-back house party, your outfit sets the tone. Opt for something that makes you feel sexy and confident—because confidence is the ultimate aphrodisiac! Just remember, you want to feel fabulous, not like you just rolled out of bed. (Leave the cargo shorts at home!)
Do #3 : Start Slow
If you’re new to swinging, there’s no need to rush in like a bull in a china shop! Take your time and ease into the lifestyle. Maybe start by attending a club to watch and be watched. You’ll get a feel for the atmosphere and what feels comfortable for you and your partner. Plus, it’s a great way to meet like-minded people and make connections!
Do #4 : Have Fun!
Above all else, remember that swinging is about sexy exploration, excitement, and enjoyment! Keep an open mind, let loose, and don’t take things too seriously. Embrace the adventure and make the most of every experience—after all, this is your chance to create unforgettable memories!
Don't #1 : Assume Everyone Has the Same Rules
Here’s a little secret: every couple is different. Just because your friends have a “no strings attached” policy doesn’t mean you should, too! Always respect the boundaries set by other couples, and don’t assume they’ll align with yours. Consent is key, so if you’re unsure, just ask! It’s better to clarify than to create an awkward situation.
Don't #2 : Forget About Personal Hygiene
This might seem like a no-brainer, but let’s make it clear: personal hygiene is non-negotiable! If you want to get busy, you better come prepared. Freshen up, trim those nails, do some manscaping and ladyscaping, wear clean clothes. And for the love of all that’s sexy, please, no one wants to smell bad at the party!
Don't #3 : Be a Drama King or Queen
Leave the theatrics at home, drama king/queen! Swinging should be fun and relaxed, not filled with jealousy, fights, or drama. If things start to get tense, take a step back and chill out. It’s all about having a good time, so don’t let petty squabbles ruin the vibe. Plus, who wants to be known as the couple that brings the drama?
Don't #4 : Be Jealous
Jealousy can rear its ugly head in any relationship, but it can be especially tricky in swinging. It’s natural to feel a twinge of envy when you see your partner flirting with someone else, but remember: this is all about fun and exploration! If jealousy starts to bubble up, take a step back, talk it out, and recalibrate your boundaries.
💋 Happy swinging!
Find all of this and more on this episode of our top-rated swingers podcast for new couples to the lifestyle, the Vanilla Swingers podcast!
Swinger Lingo (check Swinger Dictionary for more!)
Non-monogamy: The ultimate freedom of love, where relationships aren’t confined to traditional norms and exploration knows no bounds. An umbrella term encompassing various relationship styles and arrangements that allow individuals to engage in romantic or sexual relationships with multiple partners simultaneously, with the consent and knowledge of all parties involved.
Red flag: The warning sign that makes you go, “Hmm, maybe not!” – because in the game of love, trust your instincts. A warning sign or indicator of potential issues or concerns within a relationship or social interaction, prompting further examination or caution.